I receive evaluations after every workshop I facilitate. There is great value in these evaluations, even when they are hard to read. Perhaps especially so. Over time, these comments become easier to digest, partly due to the realization that everyone has different needs and preferences. Everyone walks into a training with a different level of expertise and a different way they like things done. Often the feedback I receive includes contradictory experiences (e.g. This training was too simplistic and This training was the perfect level for me) and suggestions (e.g., You should have fewer breakouts and You should have more breakouts.) I do the best I can with these, always striving to provide the most value to the most people while recognizing that everyone is in the same room taking part in the same training and there is only so much customization I can do.
John Clayton famously said, “You can please some of the people all of the time, you can please all of the people some of the time, but you can’t please all of the people all of the time”. This is as true in ZOOM trainings as it is in most other areas of life. Trying to please all of the people all of the time is a fool’s errand if there ever was one. But there is danger in using this as a reason not to adapt and adjust to meet the needs of each person as an individual. Especially when it is our job to lead a team.
There are a lot of articles, assessments, and trainings designed to help you discover your leadership style. These can provide some insight but they too often fail to highlight the fact that leadership style is necessarily situational and personal. Every staff you will ever supervise will have their own unique set of goals, strengths, values, challenges, working styles, and communication styles. Trying to lead every member of your team in the same way based on your preferred leadership style will inevitably only benefit some while harming others.
Yes, it is true that you cannot please all of the people all of the time, and as a supervisor, you will never be able to please all of your staff all of the time. But you are not leading your team all at once sitting in a room, ZOOM or otherwise. You are leading your team as you are leading each individual within it, customizing how you do so according to what each person needs.
Of course there will be moments when all of your team is together and you are trying to coach, train, guide, support, praise, or chastise them as a group. In most cases, this will land differently with every individual in the room. Like a training or a workshop, you will not be able to please every person within and as a collective. But unlike a workshop or training, you can work individually with each member of your team outside of the group to do all you can to support them in the way that they need. Every conversation, every email, every one-on-one is an opportunity to customize and individualize how you communicate and lead to meet the needs of that person in that moment.
Relationships are at the core of leadership and you will find some relationships with your staff to be easier than others. You will, frankly, find some more enjoyable than others. But regardless of your natural proclivities, you can serve each and every one of them effectively by responding to who they are and what they need. You will not always get it right, and despite your best efforts, you will receive evaluations that are hard to read. You will not and cannot please all of your staff all of the time, but you can and should please all of your staff most of the time, by listening and responding to what they need and adjusting your leadership style accordingly.
