When I was in grad school, I had an required internship three days a week. One morning just before heading out to my internship, I received an email from the financial aid office that something had happened with my application and that I would not longer be eligible to receive any student loans, loans that made it possible for me to attend school in the first place.
Panicked, I wanted to get to the bottom of it, but my commitment to my internship took precedence. Tears in my eyes, lump in my throat, I drove the forty minutes down 40 East literally sick to my stomach.
My body made it through the day but my mind was most certainly elsewhere. In hindsight, I should have stayed home to deal with the situation, which, thankfully all worked out in the end. Crisis averted, full speed ahead.
The next day, my internship supervisor asked me if I was okay. She had noticed my demeanor the day before and was concerned. I explained the situation, assured her it would not happen again and was back to my normal, focused self. The situation was addressed, explained and over with, as far as I was concerned, but unfortunately, not for my supervisor.
During my midterm evaluation, my supervisor brought up this situation again. It was not clear to me why as it was a one-time incident that was explained, addressed and did not reoccur. But she kept discussing it and included it on my midterm evaluation form using it as a justification to dock points for presence and commitment. It seemed punitive and unnecessary and I said as such but she was steadfast in her commitment to make me feel worse about something I already felt bad about and apologized for.
Yet somehow, it was not enough.
When we got to the end of the year evaluation, she brought it up again, both verbally and in writing. There it was once again on my evaluation form, an attempted indictment of my character. I had nothing else to say about it, nodded along and requested a new internship the next day.
Unfortunately, this approach to performance management is not uncommon. When staff make mistakes (and they all most certainly will), most managers see this as an opportunity to harp on that mistake, to pick it apart and proceed to bring it up over and over and over again. If only they were so committed to doing the same with praise.
The great missed opportunity when it comes to staff mistakes and successes alike is this tendency to focus on the past and not frame it in terms of the future. The real growth comes from this future focus.
When staff make a mistake, making them feel worse about it does no one any good. Generally they already feel bad about what happened. In many other situations, they do not even realize they made a mistake. Guilt and shame will not help in either of these cases. And of course, you cannot change the past. What you can change and what will help is using that moment to better prepare for the future.
Coaching is a great tool when something goes wrong. It provides space to reflect and plan for how to do something differently going forward. When your staff make a mistake, you can work with them to use it as an opportunity for growth and learning. Make them part of the process, provide space for them to reflect, and help them turn it into something positive and beneficial.
- What do you think went wrong?
- Knowing what you know now, what might you have done differently?
- What has this situation taught you?
- If this situation should arise again, what will you do differently?
- How could I have supported you better?
- How can I better support you next time?
- How will you let this go?
The purpose is not to place blame, The focus is on figuring out what happened and how to learn from it going forward. This requires honesty and accountability. Something went wrong. What caused it? What was my role? What was yours? What can we learn from it? That should be the focus.
Similarly, when your staff does something wonderful, you should create space for them to reflect and learn from it. In this case, do not insert yourself too much, but instead focus on what they did to be successful. And in this case, feel free to bring it up over and over and over again.
- What did you do that made this successful?
- Knowing what you know now, what might you have done differently?
- What has this situation taught you?
- If this situation should arise again, what will you do the same?
- What might you do differently?
- How will you celebrate this?
- How can I help you going forward?
This approach to performance management will serve your staff throughout the year, including during performance review time. Yes, it is a time to reflect on the past year, but its main purpose is to prepare for the future. The reflection should be framed as forward-focused, not dwelling on the past. Use the year’s successes and struggles to prepare for an even stronger year going forward. Work with your staff to set goals and offer the training, support, and resources they need to be reach them.
Performance review time is also a great opportunity to gauge their satisfaction in their position. Are they content? Are they ready to move up or move on? What will motivate them to stay? What will drive them to leave? You want to make it absolutely clear that you want them to be around for another year and that you are willing to work with them to make that happen.
Strong leaders recognize that mistakes are inevitable and necessary to create growth and learning. Strong leaders use mistakes to support their staffs and help them reach their goals. Strong leaders move on from the mistake once they have addressed it but go back to moments of celebration over and over and over again. This performance evaluation season, this week, this day, choose to be a strong leader.
