Managing well is difficult whether you like it or not. Whether you enjoy it or not. But do you have to love managing to be good at it? The short answer is no. Well, not really. But kind of.
Think of something you really enjoy doing, either in your personal life or your professional one. How do you feel while doing it? Whether or not you consider yourself good at it, your mindset, your feeling, and your ability to stick with it will generally be positive and easy because you enjoy what you are doing.
Now think about something you really don’t like doing, either in your personal life or your professional one. How do you feel when you have to do it? Whether or not you consider yourself good at it, your mindset, your feeling, and your ability to stick with it will generally be negative and come with great difficulty because you do not enjoy what you are doing.
Of course, life is filled with things we have to do whether we like it or not, and it is not realistic to only choose what makes us happy every minute of every day. But when we have a choice, why not choose the enjoyable one?
Unfortunately, it is not always that simple.
When it comes to our careers, we have a level of agency, and we are often at the mercy of things we have cannot control, or at the very least, have less control over. Bills need to be paid, commutes and childcare need to be taken into consideration, and leaving a job we are not happy in is a lot easier said than done. Sometimes we have to continue at something we do not enjoy for the sake of life. Sometimes we do not have a choice. And sometimes the choices we do have are equally not so great.
For many, a difficult choice comes during times of promotion. Most people are interested in making more money but in most organizations, the way to earn more money is to get promoted to management, and most people are not interested in becoming managers- only ~ 1/3 in fact. The added stress, the longer hours, the inherent challenges are simply not appealing to most people, but too often, the only hope for increased salary and opportunity is to become a manager.
Once there, some people really enjoy taking on the new role. They realize they can make a positive impact and enjoy the opportunity to build relationships with their team, leading toward a common goal. Others realize they have no interest in supervising other people, and feel weighed down by the paperwork and the complex challenges that arise in a supervisory position. Despite this, many stay because the benefits of supervising outweigh its negatives.
In some cases, you can be an effective manager without enjoying it all that much. Sometimes what we are good at does not coincide with what we enjoy. Or the things we enjoy we are not very good at. And for some people, loving their work is not that important to them. They are able to continue working at something they do not enjoy and continue to do it well.
For many, however, doing something day in and day out that they do not enjoy can take its toll mentally, physically, and emotionally. And in the case of managers, it can take its toll on the people they are managing. It is hard to feign interest or care, and if someone does not like their job, it is often pretty clear.
Being an effective manager requires a great investment of time and energy, and it requires a focus on building relationships. If you do not enjoy those relationships and begrudge the time you must dedicate to being a manager, it will be challenging to manage well. Not impossible but challenging.
And the question naturally becomes, why do something you do not enjoy?
It is not a leading question. In fact, it is an important one to ask yourself, not just right at this moment, and not just when you are considering becoming a supervisor for the first time, but a question to ask yourself over and over again.
Is there a way to be both successful and happy?
Of course, it is not always, and sometimes we are stuck in a place we simply need to endure. If you find yourself in such a place as a manager who simply does not enjoy it, I encourage you to consider the following.
- Do you have the support you need? – Sometimes people do not enjoy managing other people because they have not been properly trained and/or they do not receive sufficient support. Less than half of people unfortunately. If this is the case for you, talk to your own supervisor and ask them to provide that training and support. This can include any combination of coaching, mentoring, conferences, courses, and trainings, just to name a few. Find out what it feels like to fulfill the role with the proper training and support and then revisit how you feel when you are doing it. You may find that you quite enjoy being a supervisor once you have the tools you need to do it well.
- Which parts of the role do you not enjoy? – What about them do you not enjoy? Are there ways to minimize the amount of time you need to spend on them? Are they delegate-able? Are there ways to make them easier or more efficient? Can you get rid of them altogether? Sometimes that one burdensome task can really impact everything else. Are you able to make that one unenjoyable thing just a little more manageable?
- Are you okay not enjoying it? – And not just can you live with it, but can you sustain not enjoying it and still do right by the people you are supervising? Your satisfaction is important and so too is the satisfaction of the people you lead. Ask yourself if you are leading with integrity and remaining committed to doing the job well even if you do not enjoy it.
If you are a supervisor and you do not love it, you can still be effective at it, provided you commit to doing the work well. Provided you continue to invest in your growth as well as the growth of your team. You may decide you are okay not enjoying the role or you may decide that you would rather spend your time doing something else. Whatever you choose, honor the commitment you have made to those you lead while you are leading, and lead well.
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