Hey, New Manager- It’s Not Your Fault, But It Is Your Responsibility

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Life would be a much easier place if everyone did as they should. Unfortunately, this is not the life we live. People often shirk their responsibilities, lack follow through and choose to break promises and fall short of expectations. When we experience the consequences of these choices, we may feel cheated and justified in our righteous anger. And it will serve us no good whatsoever.

In the workplace, this shows up a lot. On an all too frequent basis, we are asked to deal with people who say they will get back to us and do not, who swear they will send the payment but still have not, who promise us raises and promotions that then seem to slip their mind, who commit to providing support but always seem to be too busy to do so. This can make us feel helpless and defeated. And it will serve us no good whatsoever.

When you are hired for or promoted into a managerial position, there should be ongoing support, training and development provided. Managing others is a skillset entirely different from the skillset required on the front lines, and just because you did your previous job well, does not mean that will translate to managing well.

We know that any new skill takes time to develop and perform successfully, and we know that people need support in the form of training, resources, development and recognition to learn that new skill well, yet when it comes to managing other people, we do not act accordingly.

Imagine getting a new client database that is intricate and requires great mastery to use effectively, and then imagine not showing your staff how to use it but instead, simply wishing them well on their way. Ridiculous, right? Yet this is what we continue to do with our new managers. We bestow on them this enormous role, that all the research in the world tells us is largely responsible for most any outcome in the workplace, and we continue to provide them no support or development. Less than half of new managers receive any management training whatsoever. Less than half. Yet we continue to scratch our heads and wonder why they are not doing their jobs well. Sigh.

If you are a manager and this is your situation, I empathize and I sympathize, as this was my own situation. And you better believe, I spent the first 6 months of my managerial journey complaining to any and everyone about the lack of support I received in an attempt to justify my terrible managing because it was not my fault. No one ever taught me how to do it, so why should I be expected to do it well? It was true that it was not my fault, but it was my responsibility.

After too many months of pouting and self-pity, I realized that, while it may not have been my fault that I did not receive any support in my new managerial role, it was my responsibility to do something about it, because I did not want to be a bad manager, and I was not going to become a good one without support. I understood the powerful effect I could have on my staff, having experienced the consequences both positive and negative, of the many supervisors I had had over the years. I knew one way or another that I wanted to use my powers for good. I wanted to be an effective leader, and even though I wanted my boss to help me get there, it was not the reality of my situation. I had to figure it out for myself, and you may too.

If you work for a boss and an organization that have prepared you effectively for your managerial role and have supported you sufficiently along the way, consider yourself fortunate. These situations are not unheard of, but they are not the norm. I hope someday they will be. For now, most of us are put in a position where we need to self-advocate to receive the support we deserve. In some cases, this may be as simple as asking your boss for a mentor, a coach, a leadership class or permission to attend an upcoming conference. These may not be offered but may be approved upon request. In other cases, such requests may be denied, and you will be in the position of having to seek such support on your own. This is, quite clearly, not ideal, but do not lose hope. There are free and affordable ways to develop your management skills that range from books to webinars to MeetUp groups and our very own Supervisors Circle that was created for this very reason. Seek and ye shall find. And while you’re at it, start seeking a new job too, because life is just too short to invest your time in an organization that refuses to invest in you.

It is true that when you are in a leadership position, you should receive support to fulfill that role effectively. It is also true that this often does not happen. It is not your fault when it does not happen, but it is your responsibility to do something about it. For the sake of those you supervise, take your role seriously and become the best supervisor you can be.  Just as it was not fair that you did not receive support, it is not fair for you to deny that same support to those you lead. 

As with all things in life, you have a choice to throw up your hands in defeat or do what you can to make your situation better. If you are serious about wanting to be a leader, know that people will not follow people who throw their hands up in the air. They follow the ones who make something happen. 

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